I work 'in house' at an architect where Revit is the mainstay, so I've thought about this a lot. If you can get hold of a copy of Revit and learn how to use VG and display filters it'll make things less painful by cleaning up before import. I know it feels more intuitive to do it with the tool you know but you really don't have to go deep in to Revit to clean up before import. Basically creating an new 3D view and hiding all the categories you can, and beyond that filtering out families from the view by type name or family name. I think you can even right click and hide by category or family too. This will mean you're not importing geo you don't need which, because it's single threaded, can be a slow process, as I'm sure you know.
It's slightly easier for me to do because I can create this view in the architects model and it will persist between design iterations, but you can save this view to a template and load it in to another copy of the file when the architect send that across.
If I know the design is likely to change soon I'll sometimes use Revit links, which is basically an xref to the 3D view. If you update the link it'll keep your material assignments and modifiers which is a life saver. Obviously if you've used an effort poly and the underlying geo changed it's going to go screwy, I don't tend to mess with the Revit geo where possible for this reason, and it's usually messy anyway with loads of floating verts, so I do things like chamfers and profiles with materials where possible if they're not already modeled. The caveat is I'm always linking from the same file, so I don't know how well it would work with a completely new file, but so long as it's the same on the architects end and you've used your VG template it should work in theory.
If I don't link and just import, I have combined by material before, but material are often the last thing the architects going to give much attention to, and it's not always easy to do in Revit in fairness, so you'll get the window reveals merged with the floor and plasterboard for example, or 3 objects called 'glass'. Therefore I have imported without combining recently. It takes a while but shouldn't be too bad if your Revit view is stripped right back. You'll still be looking at 20k+ objects for a normal tower block. The big advantage of doing it this way is that any Revit family with the same parameters (so windows the same size for example) will be instanced, so modifications are going to faster (this doesn't apply with Revit link without combining).
I have the Autodesk bundle that's Revit, Max and Autocad, if you're in a studio maybe you could get one Revit licence just for cleaning up the incoming models.
tl;dr what James said basically.