A walk in cupertino

[alias_marks]

Hi everyone, I started this one yesterday; worked on it for about 12 hours and getting some tunnel vision. Any crits would be great. Anything you think from Color, composition, and anywhere in between... is the npr working for or against the piece? whaddya think?

 

I definitely don't agree with the taupe and brown color pallette, but that's out of my control. however I may do another version with some different colors just to try and sway the design team a bit.

 

I believe it's my civic duty to do my best @ making sure something in this color range doesn't get bulit

 

Thanks for stopping by and taking a look.

 

M-

[TheAllusionisst]

...............................I believe it's my civic duty to do my best @ making sure something in this color range doesn't get bulit ...........................

 

Hmmmmm, is this structure to be built in a white village on a mountain side in Greece, or in the pink and blue "Queen Anne" district in San Francisco? I really don't understand how this color scheme is so obnoxious that you are morally obligated on some level to try and stop it from coming into existence. It is safe and conservative, but I really don't see what is bad about it. You may prefer bright reds, oranges, blues and yellows that singe the retina's, but I see no civic autrocity here. I am just curious on such strong feelings on a neutral and conservative color scheme, usually that type of color scheme is used to avoid your reaction.

[anejo]

An npr is always a challenge to critic. You almost have to know what the artist is trying to achieve before being critical.

But seeing it as it is, I would suggest either adding more depth to the blue sky (making it more vibrant) or maybe adding more reddish/orange to the sky, kind of like the way you have it on the right side, which should than work more with the taupe and browns. away good luck!

[Camby1298]

Compositionaly wise, I would get rid of or lessen the intensity of the shrubbery in front of the entrance. Its always good practice to illustrate the entry to a building, and make the viewer feel welcome to enter the building.

[Tommy L]

With the shadows laying where they are and the exposure of the people, I would lose the dusky look of the sky. I think a simple, toonish sky would work well with the splatter effect you have.

[alias_marks]

hey guys, thanks so much for stopping by to take a look.

 

@TheAllusionist: good point on the relevancy of the context. In all reality, I actually haven't been to the site, so maybe pre-maturely judged the architectural decisions. I guess It's jut my personal preference that I don't like these brown's and taupe colors that remind me of a very un-inviting, dull, 70's run down apartment building. I honestly don't feel that strongly about it, and meant it to come across as a bit more jovial that it seemed I suppose.

 

I tend to make things pretty bright maybe too much at times...

 

Thanks for the crits on the lighting, composition and sky. I agree about wanting to see the entrance... Unf, the drawings I have to work with show a green screen there. Maybe I can opacatize it out a bit (made up word of the day

 

I'll post an update as I make some changes.

Edited January 14, 2010 by alias_marks

[Ernest Burden III]

An npr is always a challenge to critic. You almost have to know what the artist is trying to achieve before being critical.

 

Never stopped me...

 

The sky is nice. But I would agree that it should lose the warm tones on the rightside horizon. The lightening treatment on the left is good, and can be repeated on the right. That makes more of a point of the bold 'splash'. The sky color is good, and you pick it up in the windows. The trees might need to be a little bit darker to avoid being in the same value range as the sky behind. If possible, I would move the sky shape left or right. The center of gravity of the visual weight is on the vertical centerline of the image. Pulling it off should add to the feel of expansiveness of the sky. Try it, see what you think. You may prefer the symmetry.

 

It would be nice to lose the center bush, but if the design is 'screen', then screen you are showing. There are probably too many people for the scale of the building. Also, make sure that their shadows go to a single vanishing point.

Edited January 15, 2010 by Ernest Burden

[alias_marks]

Thanks again for taking the time to comments & crits, they are most helpful.

 

Update:

 

 

And just for kicks, here's the base render and photoshop layers.

 

 

[Stan Zaslavsky]

Hey Mike,

I think fewer people helps with making the image more inviting

and i also second (or third) the sky being better now - if you'r going npr - then go for it all the way

just my 2c worth

[Tommy L]

I think this would also make a nice aftereffects project.

[alias_marks]

Thanks for the comments fellas, much appreciated.

 

I'm curious about what you mean by turning this into an after effects project? Care to elaborate?

[Tommy L]

Sure, I mean if you were to animated the layers it would look cool. Maybe as part of a reel. Ive been making one, so I see 'aftereffects reel potential' in everythin.

[EnterR]

I'm no professional, but I don't understand the splash sky. The house and image cropping are symmetric so for me the atmosphere is naturally calm... but then there's this dramatic flood coming from the background?

 

I'd make a calm sky and its colours colder or something, because now it comes too close. Sure you could still do some photoshop effects on a calm sky...

 

I'm really curious what is the point of a separate small bush trying to hide the entrance? If it really has to be there, maybe paint a shadow under it so it doesn't seem to grow off of the pavement.

Edited January 16, 2010 by EnterR

[robert taylor]

Very intresting work, Unique and unusual in a good way.

[alias_marks]

@EnterR I think you're quite right with regards to the background not matching the character of the static foreground. We got some similar feedback from the architects as well.

 

To be frank, I just wanted to give a splash sky a shot just cause... you know how it is... you got something you're kinda achin to try and will look for almost any excuse to do it

 

@Robert: thanks for the comment mate

 

Here's an update:

 

 

Thanks for stoppin by.

[alias_marks]

Sure, I mean if you were to animated the layers it would look cool. Maybe as part of a reel. Ive been making one, so I see 'aftereffects reel potential' in everythin.

 

Cool, good idea might have to give that a shot!

[EnterR]

Looking really good now I like the deeper colour of the building.

[heni30]

It's funny because I don't like the dark tones of the building or rather the building tones in relation to it's surroundings. The people, the fence vertical boards, the triangular piece of clap board at the bottom of the entry all seem to be saying "bright sun" and the dark tones of the building seem to be at odds with this. It reminds of Magritte's night and day painting where everything below the treeline is treated as nighttime and above the tree line the sky is bright blue with white clouds.

[alias_marks]

It's funny because I don't like the dark tones of the building or rather the building tones in relation to it's surroundings. The people, the fence vertical boards, the triangular piece of clap board at the bottom of the entry all seem to be saying "bright sun" and the dark tones of the building seem to be at odds with this. It reminds of Magritte's night and day painting where everything below the treeline is treated as nighttime and above the tree line the sky is bright blue with white clouds.

 

Good point and I at one point tried to describe to the client that.... yes I understand the paint chips need to be matched... but when you cast sunlight on them they will get lighter.... but as per usual the 'need to match these pantones' took presedence, which was one of the strategic reasons to go with an npr image on this one... and I think just fine for their purposes, but I might go back and address some of this later on...

 

thanks for the feedback, and checking it out

 

M-