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Frosty
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How about this

 

" Your landscape does not look right. Can you add some nicer trees, shrubs with coloured flowers, you know , like those plants they have in botanical gardens etc around the building and at strategic places to make it look nicer.

 

Come on, you don't really need a landscape plan for that, do you?

 

And can we see the new animation, in full resolution of course by 3.00 tommorow"

 

thinice

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this is a regaular one.....

 

"we have just sent you the latest amendments"

 

on the day we are presenting. I kid you not

 

or

 

"can you take the foreign people out the locals may not like it...."

 

and i am not joking.......

 

 

the most used phrase is.......

 

 

"CAN YOU JUST........"

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"It shouldn't take you long, we just need you to change the profile of the kerbs across the site, we need it ASAP"

 

The kerbs ran from one end to the other across a 450 metre long site for which I produced a 6 minute animation.

 

Another classic would be "It doesn't look right, you have done it wrong" which roughly translates as "Whoa, our design looks crap now that we see it in 3D for the first time"

 

or who can forget "can we see some progress shots?" whilst you are still waiting for the drawings that you have been chasing for the past week.

 

and

 

"can you do a night shot as an option" included for the same fee of course!

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'I will give you some sketch on the building and some photos I found on the internet showing the surrounding context. We will need to see the surrounding context on the animation, mountains on this side, river on that side, existing city cbd on this side and new planned cbd on the other, sorry we don't have any updated photo or any scaled survey dwg, you just have to made up everything'

 

After preview :

 

'the mountain is wrong, the cbd is of the wrong scale, there supposed to be a village under the mountain, can't you make it exact, we have given you the (tourist) map, and the (found on internet 320x480pix) photos!'

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i'm only need a single view that shows the south fassade, and the north fassade, the garden, the upper floor, and some on the interiors, and the roof...the entrance, the garaje, some cars, some plants, some people, some landscaping, some............but only one view, i don't llike to spend a lot of money on this.

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Here are some of my favorites:

 

"I thought since we bought that new computer that we wouldn’t have to wait"

 

"We have a presentation tomorrow at 3:00 and we need a photorealistic image at 24x36, we should have the model ready for you by noon today."

 

"That looks cartoonish, make it look more realistic"

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For a residence:

 

"I want to have a Bently"

 

For a Supermarket:

 

"These people won't drive cars like that" (refering to a mercedes in the image)

 

For a "liberal" news paper:

 

"I want to see homeless people, you never see homeless people in architectural renderings."

 

Have you ever had a client expect to be able to come over to your offce and watch you model or change colors and have those changes take place instantly?

 

 

I alwayse love:

 

"I want to be able to see the whole building but make sure you put alot of trees infront of it."

 

One of my first jobs:

 

"I dont want there to be any colors - showing colors just confuses the client."

 

Recently for floor plans:

 

"The decorator will let you know what the exterior elevation colors will be."

 

me: "Wait I am only coloring a floor plan where would I put the exterior colors"

 

that guy: "we will let you know I was thinking maybe on the walls."

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"The decorator will let you know what the exterior elevation colors will be."

 

I like this one the most in my work, why is it that owners will let the "decorator" do the architects job. When it does not look good, they don't blame the "decorator", they blame the architect.

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