Client Comments

[Frosty]

Heres my last few days.

Monday

Client: "We would like you to produce Image A and B"

Me: Ok

Tuesday

Client: "Scratch that, Image B only"

Me: Ok (shit happens)

Wednesday:

Client: "We changed our minds, Image A only"

Me: (biting lip) Ok, but your being charged for work already put in

Thursday

Client: "We'll get Image A and B after all"

Me: No comment

[Tommy L]

My colleague got a pretty peachy one this morning.

 

(of a glass fronted refurb to an existing city centre tower)

 

"Hmmmmm, nice, but a little bit sinky"

 

What she (a fully qualified experienced architect/director of a big practice) went on to explain when we asked the meaning of "sinky" was that

 

"....well....it kind of feels like the glass projection will fall off."

 

My colleage kindly told the silly lady this was a design issue. She responded with,

 

"just lighten the glass a little".

[Sketchrender]

Here's one from a planner recently after receiving three fully rendered images.

 

"We have some comments on your.Computer animated drawings"

 

Planners ...don't you just love them..............

 

pagliacci

[Horhe]

"I wouldnt want to live there, the clouds are gathering and is looks like its going to rain in a while"

 

 

...........THEN DONT!!!.... thats what i should have said

[Adehus]

Below is far and away my strangest client encounter (sorry for the length, hope the payoff is worth it).

 

It started with a post on the FormZ forums. A man was desperately in need of someone to help with architectural renderings, and he posted his request in strangely ungrammatic sentences with scads of unnecessary punctuation. His attempt at an explanation of his needs showed that he clearly didn't understand anything about modeling or how we do what we do, to the extent that it seemed to be scaring off most of the forum goers who are usually quick to respond to such posts (no email contact was included).

 

Unsurprisingly he was being ignored by everyone, but I needed work, so what the hell... I emailed him, and he responded by sending me photos of some buildings he wanted recreated in 3D and rendered to match as close as possible. They HAD to be done in FormZ, both the modeling and rendering, he emphasized.

 

Seemed odd, and I took a while before responding so I could think about it. Next morning there were 4 more emails from him asking me if I was going to help him out, each one a bit more desparate sounding than the last. I was a weirded out by the whole thing, so I replied that I would do it for a sum that was about twice my usual rate, and only if he would paypal the total amount to me in advance.

 

Two hours later, the money was in my account.

 

In our next email exchange he explained why he needed these photos recreated in 3D. He worked for an insurance company, and the buildings were the site of an accident claim that was being disputed in the courts. Since the insurance company for some reason wasn't supposed to be anywhere near these buildings (which were on a college campus) they needed to recreate them from the photos in order for them to be used in court. Not sure I totally understand this even now, but that's the gist of it.

 

The work was easy, and the client was easier- he seemed almost unreasonably excited by what I was doing, and asked alot of general questions about how I did various different things. He was interested to understand the process, and grateful for my explanations. Never had a client who was more easygoing.

 

So I rendered up my final views, and emailed them to him. "Great," he replied, "Now just email me the model and textures." I told him I don't typically do that, and asked him to call me if he wanted to discuss the matter.

 

He called, and he begged for them. When I asked why he needed them so desparately if he was happy with the images, the sad truth came out.

 

Turns out he was a newly-hired artist working for the insurance company. FormZ proficiency was a part of his job requirement (as was photoshop, illustrator, etc, which he did know). He told them he knew FormZ well (and apparently showed them someone elses work to prove it), IN THE HOPE THAT HE WOULD BE ABLE TO PICK IT UP ON THE JOB. This project was the first one to put that hope to the test, and unsurprisingly he was having a hard time learning 3D architectural visualization within the span of a week. At any rate, he was paying me with his own money (not his employer's), and he wanted my model so he could trick his boss into thinking he had done the work himself.

 

Good grief, I wasn't sure what to think. Felt bad about taking his money, but at that time I needed it (and he did of course freely offer it). I ended up giving him everything he asked for, and kind of coaching him on how to speak about what 'he' did intelligently.

 

I called him a week later at the insurance firm week to see how it all worked out, and he was no longer employed there.

[Justin Hunt]

My best comment for some years back:

 

"Take out the porn start with the Gimp mask on" . (There was a man walking through a foyer and a shadow happened to be falling across his face)

 

Best sign off : "It's all Tickety-Boo". (This became the studio buzz word for the rest of the month)

 

JHV

[colinsmith]

One of the most aggravating one I have had happen a few times was:

 

he “That is not the same color as the swatch I gave you”

me - “The color is outside and has exterior lighting on it”.

he - “I want it to look like my swatch"

me- “You want the color to look like it does inside under fluorescent lights not how it would look in the sun”

he- “Correct”

 

Proof that saturation of colors can change with viewers intelligence.

 

I had one like this, where the client was in a panic that the building colours in the images did not match the RAL values of the company paint schemes exactly.

 

I ended up rendering a cartoon series of about 10 spheres, starting with a 100% luminous RAL colour and adding directional lighting, lighting colours, shadows and GI one at a time until I arrived at get my final lighting setup.

 

They accepted the images, thanked me, and said they were glad there was somebody who understood these things! ;-)

[jkletzien]

There are plenty of juicy ones over the last 15 years but my absolute favorite was when we were working on a rendering of a building on a traditionally black college and the client instructed us...

 

"Don't show African American men walking with Caucasian women"

 

Apparently this is more a source of aggravation to some African American Women - I did not know.

[Crazy Homeless Guy]

just got this one, so i thought i would bring this thread back to life...

 

"Even though ###### keeps calling this an “artist” rendering, it isn’t the hand drawn artist rendering by a real person. It should be computer generated as you have always done."

 

...i didn't put the quotes around artist, the client did.

[Spooner04]

"We don't need anything that nice, can you just put it in sketchup?"

 

or

 

"That's nice, but can you make it look like a watercolor?"

[rotten42]

here's one of mine:

 

 

Client: "we have lots of time for the render (call on Monday) It's not due to next Monday. We will have all the information for you on Saturday"

 

 

?????????????

[innerdream]

I have many but here's two:

 

Client viewing an Architectural model photo I shot. "Your photo's are too Architectural!"

 

Client busts into the room. Me and my help, "we're going to go get some lunch we've been here since 5:00 am." Client, "how can you think of food at a time like this!!?!!?"

[DanNegus]

Not strictly 3D visualisation but...

 

Client : "I want a single 2d plan, showing varying concentrations of varying contaminants at varying depths over the site."

 

Me : "I sorry there aren't enough spacial dimensions in this universe."

[RTurner]

Keppin the thread alive......

 

This one burns me up....when your employer presents your work to the client and says...."isnt it amazing what computers can do!"

[pajalmeida]

The one that happened to me was with an architect i use to work, i went to his office to deliver a building i have done from his project and the first expression he said when he looked at the image was:

 

" This is all wrong, you didn´t understand anything of the project."

I said ok, but could you show me in the project that wall that you say it is wrong.

He made me a ugly face and sayd:

"I know my own projects as i know my hands!"

When he opened the project on the computer, i wanted to laugh, but i had to wait until i get out of his office, and then i laugh all the way until my office, i think he doesn't know his hand so well !!!

[STRAT]

a common one i get is -

 

"can you take out those disabled people and those black people"

[popescusro]

Hello, this is my first post. It's about a project done in one night and at a low quality. The next morning, 8:00 am, i had a talk with the architect:

 

He:"I think the columns are to thin"

Me:"???"

He:"I modified the project last night"

Me:"OK but you didnt send me the plans"

He:"I know"

 

After that remark i was unable to say anything.

[CHE]

a common one i get is -

 

"can you take out those disabled people and those black people"

 

That sounds like a happy Xenophobic office you are in Strat. Doesn't it?

[Ernest Burden III]

a common one i get is -

 

"can you take out those disabled people and those black people"

 

I just ask the person saying that to put it in writing. Preferably on corporate letterhead.

[STRAT]

usually from our clients, not my fellow staff.

[Tommy L]

a common one i get is -

 

"can you take out those disabled people and those black people"

 

To be honest, I more often get it the other way around, people asking for all walks of life to be represented.

The only people asked to be removed will be shifty looking people ie: teenagers with baseball caps and hooded tops, track pants tucked into there socks stood there looking like they want to mug a granny.

[ShaunDon]

The only people asked to be removed will be shifty looking people ie: teenagers with baseball caps and hooded tops, track pants tucked into there socks stood there looking like they want to mug a granny.

 

We've had clients who let us keep these kinds of folks in, so long as we add a few police officers and a cop car. ;-)

[Horhe]

Its not one of mine rather one from the site:

http://www.clientcopia.com

 

19 Mactonex #5595 | Rating: 4.69

 

Client rings. Client: I need some images converting to jpeg, can you do that for me? Me: Sure, just email them to me and I'll do it for you. Emails arrive and they are jpegs, so I ring client back. Me: Hi, these are jpegs already, did you need them converting to cmyk or something? Client: No, they just need to be jpegs. Me: OK, well, do you see the file extension is .jpeg?, that tells you they are jpegs. Client: That's great, do you think you could email them back to me? Me: Err... yes.

 

 

Hehehe....

[Horhe]

I had a client that wanted .tiff files in order to print.

I made .jpeg rednerings for him at 4000x3000. He wanted to use these at a maximum resolution 2500 x whatever the ratio would come out at constrained proportions.

 

He got the renderings in those jpegs. I recieved his call and he kept telling me for 10 mins that he wants .tiff files for print out. So I converted those .jpegs to .tiff in photoshop and then off they went to his mail. He was happy

 

The funny part is that he was compositing them in Photoshop onto a poster and from what i know ended up flattening the layers and saving the whole poster with the render as a .jpeg file........

[ronll]

On an elementary school rendering, I had what I thought was a charming picture in the foreground of a man with his small son walking hand-in-hand toward the school. The client comment was, "The man with a small boy could be a child molester. Could you keep the boy but change the man to a woman?" I was so irritated that I searched the web and found a picture of an infamous woman teacher that had been in the news a lot recently because she had had sex with one of her male students. I dutifully made the substitution in the rendering. Her back was to the camera so I was the only one who knew the true identity of the woman. The client was happy, so was I .