WIP baking day c. 1914

[robertmoffatt]

Studio/Institution: Shoestring Arts
Genre: Residential Interior
Software: Blender 2.70, post in GIMP
Description:

Looking for some feedback on what I can do to make this better. It was inspired by a black and white photo from Shorpy.com of a kitchen from the same time, around 1914, and a little bit from my grandmother's own kitchen that I remember as a kid (a long time ago, in a galaxy...sorry, couldn't resist). I think the color scheme is good, but I'm not sure if the lighting works. I also wanted to give it a "lived in" feel by adding grunge and wear to the walls and floor, but still retain the warmth that's Grandma's kitchen.

[Ernest Burden III]

Move the camera slightly left

[robertmoffatt]

First, thanks a lot for the reply. Second, if I can ask....why do you suggest that? I'm new at doing this, and it would help if I understood the reasoning behind the suggestion.

[RyderSK]

Your table is a strong focal point so at the moment it's too far into left. My eyes are therefore not even wandering through your composition from left to right but instead just focus on left border.

[heni30]

I think your light is kinda uniform and dull - you need to jazz it up. You have artistic license to paint with light. Look at old master's paintings.

[robertmoffatt]

Thank you for your suggestions guys...it's much appreciated. I can definitely see where you're coming from, and will make those changes.

[robertmoffatt]

 

Here is the new version with the suggestions incorporated - I changed the framing and increased the contrast and saturation.

 

Any other suggestions or feedback would be appreciated.

Edited June 10, 2014 by robertmoffatt

[Ernest Burden III]

OK, better. Now move the camera back towards the left, half the distance you moved it right. I'm sorry I didn't explain the advice before, I usually would but was in a rush.

 

Other commentors helped explain why, but beyond that are some simple points of composition. The table is a strong element and it has strong pointy edges visually. The issue is the corner hitting on a line of other elements, like the stove door or body edge. It creates tension. Before, the left edge was too close to the image edge, also creating a pinch point. Also issues with the image edges, you have a bowl on the left and pots on the right. These are nice details and as round objects you can show about 3/4 comfortably. When the edge cuts right on their edge or half point, it calls attention to the framing of the image.

 

I really like the feel of the wall plate behind the stove.

 

Maybe move the forward bread to the left so it doesn't connect vertically with the table leg, then it will be more 'contained' by the shape of the tabletop.

[robertmoffatt]

Thanks for taking the time to clarify, and particularly for explaining about the relationship of edges in a scene. It's something I will definitely keep in mind for future work.